VOTE Republican

Vote Republican. Bring on the pearl clutchers.

I’m voting Republican, because I love that what that George Bush has done for us these last 8 years.

I’m voting Republican, because I believe that global warming is a mass conspiracy thought up by suicidal polar bears, they drown themselves you know.

I’m voting Republican, because I think it’s okay to kill innocent children as long as they come from Iraq . Not if they’re still an egg though, gotta draw the line somewhere.

I’m voting Republican, because I care about fiscal conservatism when it involves keeping money from the poor people, oops, “lazy people” you know that’s why they’re poor. They don’t really want to work. We only lost 35,000 jobs this month. If they looked hard enough they’d find a job.

I’m voting Republican, because I wanted Bush to increase our national debt from 4 trillion to 9 trillion in 8 years, where do you think my tax breaks came from.

I’m voting Republican, because I believe that if I keep 500 guns in my house it will prevent terrorist from traveling 5000 miles to come hurt me.

I’m voting Republican, because I believe that invading a sovereign nations who have done nothing wrong is mandatory to stop the spread of terrorism. It makes people around the world love and respect us.

I’m voting Republican, because John McCain is going to tell the lobbyist he’s taking back Washington . As soon as they are done running his campaign.

I’m voting Republican, because I love my freedoms, like religion in all the schools and my right to get a petition and speak freely in a free speech zone. Aren’t you happy George gave us that one?

I’m voting Republican, because I think Habeas Corpus is the name of a Muslim extremest. Yeah, I heard we got him. He is D-E-A-D!

I’m voting Republican, because I love to be watched over all the time it makes me feel so safe! George even reads my e-mails first for me. I heard they can have a virus, well I’m not getting sick.

I’m voting Republican, because I just don’t think gas going from $1.47 to $3.99 in 4 years is high enough.

I’m voting Republican, because when the bank took my house they forgot to take my neighbor’s and he’s a Democrat.

I’m voting Republican, because Sarah Palin is gonna teach abstinence in all the schools she’ll bring her daughter in for show and tell.

I’m voting Republican, because I really believe the Oil Companies are only profiting 4% not the 50% increase for the share holders revinue that’s been reported by the “Liberal Media”.

I’m voting Republican, because my Bible tells me so.

I’m voting Republican, because I think waterboarding sounds like fun. I didn’t realize we treated our POW’s to a day out on a boat. See, isn’t the U.S. nice.

I’m voting Republican, because you’re not a patriot if you don’t.

Makes you wonder why anyone would vote Democrat now, doesn’t it?